Jailhouse Rock

We've all seen the celebrity mugshots of Lindsey Lohan, Robert Downey Jnr, Shia LaBeouf, the list goes on, and they're rarely if ever charged with any serious felonies so it's understandable if their post arrest pictures are somewhat nonchalant looking.

With a prison population at well over 2.5 million and rising in the US, you might be forgiven for thinking that law and order has escaped the vocabulary of an entire nation, and wonder who is to blame. Is it the education system, the media, the judicial system, or the modern family. A complex question perhaps, to be discussed another day, but for now let's have a look at the mugshots of some not so famous people, who found themselves on the wrong side of the law and the lens – say cheese.

With 'psycho' tattooed on his forhead, its no stretch of the imagination that this gentleman wasn't arrested for an inconsistent tax return, or driving without a seat belt, but instead assault.

Drug dealing Р with her greying hair, and demure expression, you would be forgiven for assuming the cops had made a critical error in arresting our grandmother, but no. One too many episodes of 'Narcos' had her substituting her crocheting for cocaining.

With a look not too dissimilar to every science teacher, accountant, or indeed reverend, you might have assumed that this arrest would surely be for a misdemeanor, a minor offence, an oversight of sorts but to the relief of our farm animal, this gentleman was incarcerated for performing acts with his livestock that most would agree ought to remain between similar species.

The brazen look, the smirk, the look of contentment. It will come as no surprise what this man was arrested for, and the self incriminating t-shirt? Open and shut case.

Call the beard police, the real police, the fire brigade, the ambulance, anyone, and arrest this man for crimes committed against the most sacred of institutions, a man's beard! Who,where, how, or why it occurred to him that this fashion statement was well advised, was ill advised. His crime was the sale of marijuana, and I'm thinking he might well have consumed half of his supply.

Being a landlord myself I'm quite particular with whom I allow to rent from me, and although we're taught not to judge by appearances, and to give everyone a chance etc, I tend to lease my properties to those who at least on the surface appear to be run of the mill, average, regular folk, with the odd tattoo or piercing here and there, but never horned. Those horns always get you in the end, as his landlord found out when he was mown down by this gentleman's vehicle over a dispute. So with that in mind, If it has horns and it's not an antelope, a rhino, or a gazelle, then you don't argue with it, reason with it, or dispute over rent arrears with it.

Those bedroom eyes! Arrested for stealing sex toys, the eyes would suggest that she managed to make use of her acquisitions before she was apprehended. Either that or she was heavily 'medicated'.

Horned individual number 2 was arrested for slashing his wife with a blade. The fact that he managed to secure a wife is the most curious thing about this story, but there is someone for everyone they say. There is hope for us all, horns or no horns.

Another case of hit and run, but in this case you might feel some sympathy for this lady. Her boyfriend told her that he deliberated infected her with aids, so in response, she infected him with her truck!

So our horned theme continues, albeit in a less committed fashion, seeing as he merely tattoos his versus our previous examples with their implants. Nevertheless his crimes are no less grievous, when you consider that he robbed and assaulted his current girlfriend's ex boyfriend. Ladies come in close, a little closer, just a bit more. If a guy has 'fuck cops' above his eyebrows, and horns tattooed on his forehead, then for the love of all things wholesome find an unhorned individual…some still exist.

Credit: American Eye